Poof!

Ok, so its getting down to the wire, and I still have another project to do before the party. I picked up a bunch of this stuff called Decorative Mesh on clearance at Joann, with no real idea of what I was going to do with it. I thought maybe i could use it to decorate my pinata, but it wasnt really needed.

Then I got home and remembered I had another roll of it that I had bought for decorating the Halloween bathroom and never used. Well crap. I have three rolls of decorative mesh.... time to google what to do with it.

The interwebs inform me that this stuff is all the rage right now, and that the appropriate use mostly involves making ugly wreaths. Since I have a few extra styroform wreath forms around from a candy project, I decided to go this direction. First, the wreathform needs to not be white.

I happen to have a lot of orange glue left over, so I start with that. I've had bad luck with paint melting Styrofoam before, so i am hoping the glue kinda seals it. Problem: it is round. Solution: napkin holder.

A few coats later, and some of the remaining acrylic, and I have it to a state of appropriate orangishness. 

The instructions I have found mostly require zip ties, pipe cleaners or floral staples. Wtf is a floral stpaple? I dunno, but I have some orange wire. Hopefully I can make it work. I cut it into zip-tie-type lengths.

This is when I learn the true nature of decorative mesh. It is made of pure, unfiltered Satan. I hate it. I hate it forever. I wish to wrap my enemies in cocoons of decorative mesh. It is a lot like that stuff they make those bath poufs out of, but it is sharp and evil. It gets stuck to itself constantly, and my hands look like they have been through a cat fight. I didn't take many pictures of the process, because I wanted it to end as quickly as possible. It primarily involved wrangling foot long sections of mesh onto the wreath form every 3 inches using wire. This is what it looked like about halfway done:

Well. This is the completed version, I guess? Its really ugly. My whole idea for this project is to hang little messages for my friend from her friends and family on it. I dunno if it deserves that kinda treatment, but its what I have. 

I added a hanger, because hopefully it can be hung. It looks like a monster that crawled its way up from the depths of Bloodbath and Beyond and is coming to eat the world's children. Far be it from me to stand in its way.

It is poofy. AMAZINGLY poofy. I decided maybe a bow would help it out. I don't know why. When has a bow ever helped anything, really? 

I cut a bunch of ribbon and attached some blank white tags so that we can all write hopeful and loving messages to my friends. I may include some sort of spell to keep this wreath thing from growing and eating her grand children and cat. 

This is as final as this project gets. I hope whoever finds it at the Goodwill after she has torn off the tags really enjoys it. I feel sort of guilty presenting this at the party, and yet I will do it anyway. Maybe it can be ritually burned. I am adding another tag to it that says "Having leukemia is as crappy as this wreath." If craft chemotherapy exists, this thing definitely needs it.

I still have two rolls of the mesh left. I now understand why it was on clearance for less than a dollar. I hope someone else can figure out how to turn it into something party-worthy.